Morning…A fun school team meeting last night where conversation should have put us off our lasagne but somehow didn’t. One member went to a PROPER health spa…not sure my Gillian McKeith question about changes in texture after daily colonic irrigation and fruit juices was totally appropriate and when I used the wonderfully descriptive but rather unpleasant word ‘moist’ my dinner table etiquette went down hill fast. I did learn a thing or two and as such my breakfast will be a straight gin, followed half an hour later by a Mars bar and half an hour after that a Vodka…what a revelation that they were good, although not sure I will be allowed to work with children in the future if I follow this regime daily!

Just been to the fridge to take the cheesecake out I bought to take for school INSET lunch. Gob smacked to find that for the second time this year my purchase has been scoffed, but this time by my husband! Apparently, despite the fact that I was out for a meal he thought I’d bought it as a present for them all to eat…I’m often kind like that. Did point out that he has previously told our boys off for eating his food purchases without asking so surely the same rule applied…not sure that went down too well. Off to find shops open before 8.30am with lush desserts.

Morning…they say never work with children or animals and after last nights sleep I’m extending that to never have them! I’m presuming children dressed as animals must be doubly horrendous although there is a cuteness there that softens tolerance levels.

2am woken by bright lights and loud TV which son failed to switch off. 4am woken by meowing cat jumping on bed with present in mouth…I scream and husband promptly reprimands ME for apparently waking the neighbours. Hopefully they were asleep like I wanted to be. I shut him…the cat not the husband, (although it could easily have been both) outside the bedroom. 6am woken by cat meowing to be let back in, so husband eventually after much scratching and noise opens the door. I am then awake at a stupidly early time on a Sunday, having been disturbed one too many times. Husband goes down to make a cup of tea and finds a bird flying round the kitchen so cat doesn’t even do a very good job with his loving gift… a Sunday miracle!

Morning…up early to return home. No more sun, sights, excess food or alcohol…well for a while! Instead it’s work, washing, wet weather and Winston!

By this evening completely travelled out what with coach, plane and car stuck in an M25 traffic jam…bye bye holiday, hello reality and five baskets of washing piled up waiting to be loaded.

Winston grown and cats and dying plants happy to see us.

Morning…don’t want to rub it in but sun is exhausting…will rub in Factor 50 Sun cream which has been unsuccessful so far with preventing sunburn to peeling shoulders and tummy button.

Does this hotel think it’s guests are all size 6/8, something I have only ever dreamed of? Bath towels are size of tea towels and I’d be lucky if they cover my foot never mind my likely to offend private parts…not sure they are up to much of their prime use of drying either…all in all more of a wet flannel experience!

Holiday rep broke the news that no one was coming to our hotel from next resort so husband paid for son’s two bags to take a ride in a taxi…who would have thought two plastic bags would travel with such room and style…hope they were at least designer bags and not blue and red striped value ones! Husband and I went shopping, tried to find a bus stop and after 20 minutes of walking in the midday heat I started to feel dodgy, so husband paid for a 2 day small car rental…sadly not much room and travel style for us two old bags.

Husband drove us to the top of the mountains to a place called Cap De Formentor. Stunning views but being a passenger as the car climbed the narrow, winding cliff roads my nerves were rattled and climbing like a mountain goat my legs were shaky…hope photos are worth the experience.

Husband had an evening dress mishap when carrying three glasses to the bar, his trousers fell down. He quickly handed them to son ( glasses not trousers) whilst he hoisted them up and tried to look as if nothing was wrong and behave as though acting the clown is not what he does best..we of course know otherwise.

Morning…Welcome to Palamos and “Muchas gracias” todays words to remember. Off to Barcelona by coach to visit shops and ramble down Las Ramblas, whilst sons have a tour of the football stadium…hope it doesn’t get messy.

Las Ramblas purchase was a sparkly fan to keep me cool although husband not a fan of purchase…purple obviously not his colour.

C&A finally found…husband went up to the Home/Man floor and after finding some ladies garments I joined him to look at the home department anticipating cushions, bedding and kitchen ware. Disappointed to learn that ‘Home’ in this instance was Spanish for man, so men’s clothing was all I had to view. They did have a toilet I could avail myself of but needed to go to the top floor to get a coin in exchange for my receipt. Despite vowing never to speak Spanish again nature necessitated it. Ageing, forgetful brain and inept language skills meant I was heard muttering like a lunatic woman “laverbos por favour” continuously as I travelled up the escalators of several floors until I finally reached the staff on top floor and spurted out the words very pleased with myself. I even managed a “Donde?” I didn’t understand the answer but thankfully it was accompanied by a pointing finger.

Boys did get Messi…well a phony photo of him grinning like a Cheshire cat and them standing next to him with their thumbs up.