May 28, 2015

Friday 24th – Sunday 26th April Body Image Issues!

Morning…Last night I woke in the middle of the night freezing cold. It was hardly surprising when I found myself only covered with a piece of sheet and had to grapple for a bit of duvet. Thank goodness it is Friday.

Whilst I might be losing it slightly and feel like this more often than not…

i've reached the age...

…I am pleased to note that our musical society choreographer who is in her eighties and is extremely blunt has not. I was showing her a photo on my Iphone and she suddenly took a glance at my stomach and said “you have a tummy”…how very observant of her. I felt like responding “yes, indeed I have. I also have two legs, arms, eyes and ears.” I didn’t because I thought that would have been rude, but then again did she care? My tummy, arms, legs, in fact, my whole body including my brain will be preparing itself tonight for my first ever dance show next weekend and at the rate I’m going it will need a lot of preparation.

It is Saturday and after yesterdays postal delivery I am now the proud owner of a pair of black, dance jazz pants and easy to put on silver shoes.

dance shoes

Unfortunately when you have fat ankles and they only just fit round them, they are not easy to get off! Quick changes could be interesting as trying to undo them took at least 5 minutes and required me to sit in a contorted position on the floor. Upstage dress rehearsal last night and I’m still working on trying to remember the moves my body struggles to do…I have a week for dancing miracles to happen!

At work yesterday my body struggled to sit in a chair and I was on the floor again. The chairs are very low as I was sitting on a school chair suitable for 5 year olds, but whilst my bottom was on its way down it wasn’t expecting to go down so far, so sudden or it be so hard! It wasn’t a pretty sight, getting up wasn’t either and pretending that sitting on the floor and missing the chair completely was perfectly normal behaviour for a teacher, put my acting skills to the test. The children might have been convinced, but the staff looking at me certainly weren’t…they LAUGHED!

red chair

It’s Sunday and what a busy day I had yesterday. Fiddler on the Roof costume rehearsal where apparently I was told I looked Welsh or like a gypsy… no mention of looking Jewish, which is fairly important in Fiddler on the Roof. I think the issue was the red flowery scarf tied round my neck.

red scarf

Whilst reflecting on my costumes, why is it I have to wear long, full skirts which accentuate the hips? Perhaps I did not help with the mid afternoon birthday cake snack. The early evening wine at the pub before watching friends sing in a concert locally, were naughty, unnecessary added calories. I suppose I should have said “no” to the late night curry at Cinnamon Bay afterwards and what was I thinking with an even later night drink with my son in the pub where he works?…I’m now exhausted and my hips even bigger! The reason for the pre pub visit was that we were given the wrong start time for the concert. We rushed to arrive at a given time only to find the doors weren’t open until half an hour later, so a visit to the pub it had to be! We went in search of a pub local to the venue and saw in the distance the hopeful, Courage Pub Brewery sign. We walked towards it in anticipation only to find it wasn’t what we thought…

courage body image

Does beer really give the body image a beauty parlour would want? flabby, beer belly, untoned, moobs..my friend modelled outside the signpost with a tip top ‘body image’ rather than me with my already problematic tummy, ankles, hips and brain. However, if  I was after a beauty makeover, a beauty parlour linked to a Courage brewery isn’t an advertisement that really works.